Tag Archives: Valentine’s Day

Love Letter to Myself

Valentine’s Day has returned, and on a Saturday this year! I had planned to stay in bed all day (hiding), but someone suggested I try writing a love letter…to MYSELF. My first thought was that there was absolutely NO WAY I would EVER do that. Then, noticing my strong negative reaction, I figured maybe it was worth a try.

To begin, I imagined what I would say in a love letter to another, but after trying to translate that formula to myself, I was left with keywords for practicing a job interview. I got frustrated, but instead of giving up, I realized that one of the things I love about myself is that I don’t give up easily, and I dove in deeper. Here is the final draft:

My Darling Me,

Thank you for challenging me and persisting every time I feel like giving up. You know that you are the one I trust and rely on. You are the one I talk to (often out loud) when I need to sort out the mess of thoughts in my head. You are the one who lulls me back to sleep in the middle of the night when my “shoulds” torture me awake.

I admire your uniqueness, and that when others comment on how you march to the beat of your own drum, you take it as a compliment. You are not only clever and curious, but you also know the proper way to load a dishwasher.

You work hard to approach situations with compassion and to be the bright light in someone else’s day, and I’m amazed by how you can always find the silver lining when storm clouds roll in.

I love that you can be completely absorbed by the simply beauty of a butterfly, or a sky full of twinkling stars. I love your laughter when things go right, or even when things go wrong. It is comforting to know you will allow me to take a time out when I need a break, and even when you lie to me, I understand it is meant to stall the truth until I’m ready because sometimes reality hits too hard all at once.

Please remember that I will always be your biggest fan. Happy Valentine’s Day!

Love, Me

Love Everyday

 

I don’t acknowledge February 14. Upon hearing this blasphemous slight against St. Valentine, some identify me as a bitter old maid. Possibly true, but my distrust of this Hallmark holiday actually began way back when the meaning behind a Valentine had nothing to do with romance. Starting in second grade, construction paper hearts, and candy imprinted “Be mine” were currency in the popularity market. Where was the LOVE?

 

Even after I was old enough to date, the popularity contest continued. Who got the biggest box of chocolate? Who got the most beautiful roses? And despite flowers or chocolate, the effort made by whichever poor schmuck I happened to be dating felt so forced, staged, OBLIGATORY. Would any one of them have considered such overt wooing another time?

 

 

So, it’s not that I hate love. In fact, my love of LOVE is precisely why I’m opposed to Valentine’s Day. Everyday should be about sharing love. Each of us should be encouraged to express love in unique, individual, personal ways 365 days a year. Designating a single day to be in love where flowers and chocolate are mandatory has two outcomes: A) It excludes the relationship challenged, and B) It requires couples to conform to cliché versions of romance. Valentines Day robs LOVE of its pure and honest simplicity.

 

 

Love ends up being quantified in dollars which makes no sense 😦

 

 

Until I experience a heartfelt demonstration of pure love that happens to fall on February 14, I will not acknowledge the day as special. I will not post cutesie messages on Facebook. I will not dine at restaurants with special price fixed menus for two. I won’t wear red or pink. I will watch movies about love on another day. I will eat the little candy hearts after they go on sale, and I will cut perfect heart shapes out of paper next Tuesday…but until we learn to love everyday, I’m boycotting February 14.